Floyd

The beauty of this child's smile just melts my heart. When he giggles, my cares fade away. When he rests in my arms, God whispers to me 'See, that's what faith is all about.'

My Time or God's Time?

"God made time and He made plenty of it." - an Irish saying

After a year of break from Sunday School teaching, I was asked to substitute for a Nursery class. It was a call for dependence on God. Personal and career tasks were left and right. The question whether "my time is God's time or not" lingered. At last, I said "yes" by faith. And surprisingly, I came in on time and had a great classroom experience with the kids. So I pondered, "How easy is it to just give God everything and He will make everything beautiful in His time?". Truth is, I seldom know. For me, my time is "my time" so God's time could be scheduled.

I have deeper issues on time management but I just don't want to admit it. I often say that tasks are too big and too plenty so I could not finish everything on time. This mind-set creates a domino effect on my schedule, on my health and on people around me. I have to apologize again and again for cancelling an appointment, for missing a deadline, and for not making it to family celebrations and friends' invitations.

God has been convicting me to re-read my daily planner and boy, it's so filled. So it hit me: I do know how to plan but I don't know how to say "NO" to some people -- so schedule's never-ending. And the contents of my planner further hit me, I don't know how to say NO because I am afraid to displease some people, but in effect I displease the more important ones, too.

Surprisingly, my issues on time management is greatly connected to my low self-esteem. I was raised in a family where self-worth could be equated to achievements, contributions and service. When I was in grade school, I was trained to study hard to earn pride for my name and for my reward. If I didn't have high grades, I won't have a raise in my allowance. My father would not attend a ceremony if I was not the one who got the first honor. When I was just starting to work and was earning so low, I would go home and found no food for me. My mother said I was not contributing enough so I would not have my fill. As the eldest among the siblings, I could not say no whenever my mom would tell me to do the projects of my brothers while they played. Right now, the only reason that I was welcomed home because I finance my youngest brother's tuition and being here would probably end when he'll finally graduate.

I was raised to be the family's servant and I think there's nothing wrong with that. Service given to a family should never be counted because they are your blood and gift. However, in my heart, it's still not clear why should I be highly regarded by my parents based on what I did. Could it not be because I am their daughter, their own? I tried telling my parents what I felt and nothing changed. My life with them was a series of hurtful words out of discontent and denial. It seemed like the only way to enjoy their company is to keep on pleasing them.

So at school, work and church I tried to find self-worth, but I fell into the pattern of doing what others expect me to do. I gained applause, good commendations, promotions and trust, but all of these are tied up with work. Workaholism became my life. I enjoyed being appreciated by others because of my contributions and service to different organizations. One planner seemed not enough for a busy woman like me. And yes, it took me a long time before I admit that I am prioritizing my service to people who greatly recognize me (like my bosses and my churchmates) than my service to my family. I could not make a restful schedule because I don't really enjoy being home.

In my recent quiet time with God, He gave me these Bible verses:

For apart from Him, who can have enjoyment? - Ecclesiastes 2:25

I have seen the business that God has given to the children of man to be busy with. He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end. - Ecclesiastes 3:10-11

These biblical truths inspire me to come clean. I asked help from God in dealing with my life issues. Sucking at time management was caused by my endless pursuit of finding self-worth in pleasing others. It's not healthy. It's not fun to have sleepless nights finishing lessons, newsletters and curriculum just to make the boss or the ministry head smile. I missed the point that these people are still people, as frail as my family who couldn't be easily pleased as well.

So if I really want to find enjoyment, there's no other person whom should I please but my Loving God. He said, "I have loved you with an everlasting love;therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you" (Jeremiah 33:3).

God's time should be my priority. Right now, He's opening my eyes to see which ones are important and not. I might be learning the art of saying NO slowly, but at least, I am getting there. I am confident that even without trying to please others, I am loved. Even without filling my planner, He is creating opportunities for me and my family to reconcile, heal and enjoy each other's company for real. When He took residency in my heart, Jesus started cleaning up the mess. How comforting it is to just listen to His teachings and obey them as a child clings unto her Father.

His time with me is being spent through words of love, promises of comfort and actions that brought forth peace. In this heart I know He is making all things beautiful in His time.

Power for the Juggling Act

As Christians, we sometimes feel that sharing Christ's truth and love is tiresome and challenging. We have to take care of our earnings while doing familial and church responsibilities. Paul, the first Christian missionary to non-Jews experienced the same thing. Despite of political and religious attacks, he kept on sharing his faith everywhere he went. His juggling act required much selflessness. In the following passage, he did not utter a word on how tired he was on his journey and about people's indifference toward him. He did not say how fearful he was for his life for the cause of the gospel -- but God knew, for He saw everything. What did God promise a person whose heart was set on him? Let's take a look at this story.


Word Meanings
Corinth – a city in Greece
synagogue – a place where the Jews prayed and talked about their faith together
Judaism – the common and acceptable faith for the Jews; they believed only the first five books of the Old Testament; followers of this faith was the majority block that dictate Jewish politics and culture; their leaders put Christ to death and they denied His resurrection and deity; they perceive God as Israel’s keeper and that they should worship Him through observing a set of laws alone
the law – the first five books of the Old Testament which Judaists believe in
Christianity – the faith of Paul and Christ’s other apostles and disciples; this faith establishes that there is no other way to belong to God’s family than having faith in Jesus Christ
worshipers of God – Christians; they believe that Jesus is the Savior that the God promised in the time of Adam, Abraham, Moses and David; they accept that Jesus raised from the dead, and that He is indeed the Son of God, and their Master and Lord


Acts 18:1-21

1 After this, Paul left Athens and went to Corinth. 2 There he met a Jew named Aquila, a native of Pontus, who had recently come from Italy with his wife Priscilla, because Claudius had ordered all the Jews to leave Rome. Paul went to see them, 3 and because he was a tentmaker as they were, he stayed and worked with them. 4 Every Sabbath he reasoned in the synagogue, trying to persuade Jews and Greeks.
5 When Silas and Timothy came from Macedonia, Paul devoted himself exclusively to preaching, testifying to the Jews that Jesus was the Christ.[a] 6 But when the Jews opposed Paul and became abusive, he shook out his clothes in protest and said to them, "Your blood be on your own heads! I am clear of my responsibility. From now on I will go to the Gentiles."
7 Then Paul left the synagogue and went next door to the house of Titius Justus, a worshiper of God. 8 Crispus, the synagogue ruler, and his entire household believed in the Lord; and many of the Corinthians who heard him believed and were baptized.
9 One night the Lord spoke to Paul in a vision: "Do not be afraid; keep on speaking, do not be silent. 10 For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and harm you, because I have many people in this city." 11 So Paul stayed for a year and a half, teaching them the word of God.
12 While Gallio was proconsul of Achaia, the Jews made a united attack on Paul and brought him into court. 13 "This man," they charged, "is persuading the people to worship God in ways contrary to the law."
14 Just as Paul was about to speak, Gallio said to the Jews, "If you Jews were making a complaint about some misdemeanor or serious crime, it would be reasonable for me to listen to you. 15 But since it involves questions about words and names and your own law—settle the matter yourselves. I will not be a judge of such things." 16 So he had them ejected from the court. 17 Then they all turned on Sosthenes the synagogue ruler and beat him in front of the court. But Gallio showed no concern whatever.

18 Paul stayed on in Corinth for some time. Then he left the brothers and sailed for Syria, accompanied by Priscilla and Aquila. Before he sailed, he had his hair cut off at Cenchrea because of a vow he had taken. 19 They arrived at Ephesus, where Paul left Priscilla and Aquila. He himself went into the synagogue and reasoned with the Jews. 20 When they asked him to spend more time with them, he declined. 21 But as he left, he promised, "I will come back if it is God's will." Then he set sail from Ephesus.

What does the Bible say about God?
1. He makes ways for His beloved to have friends. (verses 1-3, 18)
2. He sustains His beloved by providing jobs for them. (vv. s 2-3)
3. He encourages Christians who have work to not forget sharing the gospel. (v. 4)
4. He gives Christians the courage, power and inspiration to give his best in sharing the faith. (vv. 5-8)
5. He clearly brings up a Christian’s heart issues and comforts him right away. (vv. 9-11)

What does the Bible say about people?
1. They are often comfortable with who they are and what they believe in, and are often ready to strongly fight for that faith, no matter how wrong it is. (vv. 6, 12-17)
2. People’s actions are deeply rooted from their belief-system that’s why conflicts happen. Not all people have the same faith, therefore not all have the same God.
3. Christians were persecuted for their faith but all they can do is to not hold any grudge against people who hate them and continue with God’s work.

Related link: What kind of faith God wants from me?
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+4:23-25&version=NIV


Questions to Ponder
1. What do I think about Christianity? How does it differ from other faith?
2. Is the object of my faith correct? Am I ready to strongly fight for it and not give up until the end?
3. What kind of faith is acceptable to God? (Read John 4:24 for the answer.)

Chat with God

Dear God,

You are awesome! Even we don’t utter a word, You know what’s going on. You see the exact fears, questions and pains that we keep. Bless our hearts. Make them beat only for You so that we won’t stop sharing this Christian faith with others. It is worth fighting for. For Your Son Jesus Christ has showed us real love in the cross.

The power that we have when we are beset with challenges for the cause of this faith is insurmountable for it comes from You. It’s indeed hard to balance our work and ministry but You are the source of our strength. This juggling act is possible because of You.

You are our driving force, our warm embrace, our secret keeper, our ever loving Savior. You deserve our time and effort and most importantly – our praise!  Thank you for everything. Inspire us to love you more and more each day.

In Jesus’ most powerful name we pray, Amen.